Duckers & Diving: Just kidding about

MORE animal shenanigans from our celebrated columnist this week as he catches up with commercial property stalwart Glyn Pitchford.

Being stalked by a normal goat is bad enough but one with three legs is something else. The fabled creature is continuing to blight the life of Birmingham businessman Glyn Pitchford as he looks to relax at his Majorcan retreat.

Still, the old boy has vowed to get even…by threatening to eat the beast should he ever be able to catch it.

Pitchford holidays on the island and is not enamoured with goat and its chums because they roam around the ranch eating his flowers.

Now he’s vowed to eat them in retaliation.

Well, that seems a fair exchange to me – the only problem is that Pitchford is so slow these days that even a three-legged goat can get the better of him.

Sounds like some kind of animal Paralympic versus Pensioners Olympics.

He writes: “Forgot to tell you that for anyone out there interested in the hapless three-legged goat we discovered last year, it was sighted this summer looking very much alive (unfortunately) and suspiciously pregnant!

Duckers and Diving “Its kid should be really tasty, if we can catch it.”

Pitchford’s blood lust is deeply worrying.

I fear the veteran surveyor has missed his vocation – maybe there’s still time to audition for a part in one of those vampire movies.

Still, apparently goat curry is very acceptable.

Making me hungry just writing about it.

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