How to work with someone you hate

We’ve all worked with people who are rude, annoying, selfish, lazy or just completely insufferable. And it’s not just your mood they affect when they’re constantly complaining, whining or generally being self-centered, working with someone you despise can have a negative impact on your performance too.
Avoiding people you don’t like is a great tactic if you can get away with it but as we all know, it’s not always possible.

Fortunately, with the right tactics in place, you can still have a productive working relationship with someone you can’t stand.

Keep your opinions to yourself

While working through your displeasure, avoid the temptation to slander the person with other colleagues. Complaining about someone in your office is more likely to reflect negatively on you than them.

You may gain a reputation as unprofessional from going behind colleagues backs so if you need to vent, pick someone outside the office.

Is it you?

Pinpoint exactly what it is you don’t like about the person. Jealousy and other negative emotions can cause us to wrongly assess and mistreat others.

Author of Good Boss, Bad Boss Robert Sutton believes that differences make us biased.

“Our favorite person in the world is ourselves. The more someone differs from us, the more likely we are to have a negative reaction to them,” he says.

However if in every office there’s somebody you hate, it might be time to take a look in the mirror. 

Get to know them

It might sound odd and you’d probably rather do a lot of unpleasant things than spend time with that person, but one of the best ways to work with someone you dislike is to understand them.

Give them a chance to explain why they are so rude or miserable – Maybe they’re stressed at work, or have problems at home that you just might be able to relate to.

Tell them

If none of the above tactics have worked, you may want to consider giving your colleague a bit of constructive criticism – the operative word being a bit here. It could be that what bothers you is something that has been holding them back professionally.

They may not even know how their coming across and by letting them know you will enhance their self-awareness and increase their likability as well.

But, be aware, they may want to throw some criticisms your way, so be prepared to take what they say on board. 

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