Why constructive ‘conflict’ could be the key to your success

Conflict is a word that often carries negative connotations. Usually associated with aggression, arguments and hostility, it’s not surprising that many leaders discourage conflict in the workplace. But conflict doesn’t have to be destructive or unproductive – and Mike Ader, from Vivid Grey, says those avoiding it could be missing out on growth, innovation and ultimately, success.  

When managed correctly, conflict becomes constructive conflict, and this can have transformative power. Rather than encouraging personal attacks or emotional battles, constructive conflict is about generating healthy, passionate and professional discussions. It can challenge ideas, refine strategies and encourage diverse perspectives. Encourage critical thinking, the questioning of assumptions and better decision-making.

But how can leaders foster a culture that encourages healthy debate, and avoid the kind of destructive conflict that can be so damaging? First, we have to understand the difference between the two.

The difference between constructive and destructive conflict

Both forms of conflict involve disagreements, but there is one key difference between them. Whereas constructive conflict centres on opposing views on issues, destructive conflict tends to concentrate on the individuals involved, making it much more negative and potentially harmful.

When we refer to constructive conflict, what we’re really talking about is healthy, productive and respectful disagreements between team members who have different viewpoints. No arguments in sight, simply open discussions during which people are encouraged to share their perspectives and try to understand those of others, challenge ideas and explore potential solutions. The whole focus is on collaboration and problem-solving; bringing teams together to reach better, more well-rounded solutions that create an improved outcome for everyone.

Conversely, destructive conflict tends to be emotionally charged, characterised by personal animosity and often involving personal attacks and disrespect. Those involved will refuse to listen, understand or empathise and may even walk away, making open communication difficult and resulting in angry exchanges as frustrations rise. Rather than focusing on finding a solution, destructive conflict is driven by a much more selfish desire to win the argument, and decisions made as a result are often rushed or based on fear rather than careful deliberation and strategic thinking.

It’s not hard to see how the word conflict has become associated with hostility and tension but it’s vital that leaders take a step back and realise the positives too. Avoiding all conflict is as dangerous as allowing the wrong kind to flourish.

Why a fear of conflict can be paralysing

When we shy away from conflict, we’re actually shying away from communicating. Those difficult discussions we’re so fearful of having are essential to building a culture of trust – and avoiding them can stifle growth and creativity.

Patrick Lencioni’s book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, explains this in more detail. In it, Lencioni identifies fear of conflict as one of the core dysfunctions that prevent teams from reaching their full potential, alongside the absence of trust, lack of commitment, avoidance of accountability and inattention to shared goals and results.

He argues that fear of conflict creates an environment of false harmony, where problems go unspoken and resentment festers. Individuals don’t feel listened to or that their ideas are valued, so they’re reluctant to commit to a common goal. As a result of their apathy towards the chosen approach, they don’t hold themselves accountable or to high standards, leading to poor results.

Conversely, if a team feels heard and involved in decision-making, they’re more likely to be on board with the conclusion, work hard to realise the shared goal and thus drive better outcomes overall.

The benefits of constructive conflict

By embracing constructive conflict, leaders can cultivate an environment of progress and success, with:

• More innovation: when individuals feel able to challenge ideas and express opinions, they are more creative and freethinking. Innovation happens when people are pushed to think critically and feel safe to put forward bold new ideas.
• Improved decision-making: constructive conflict brings different perspectives to the table, allowing teams to examine all angles and arrive a well-rounded, thought-through decision.
• Stronger teams: teams that are encouraged to debate respectfully build trust. They learn it’s possible to disagree, discuss and work together without damaging relationships.
• Greater accountability: when individuals are expected to back up their arguments with evidence or reasoning it creates a culture of accountability. Everyone is expected to contribute to discussions and work on the outcome.

The reasons to encourage constructive conflict are clear, but ensuring the discussions remain healthy and positive rather than hostile and hurtful doesn’t happen by accident.

Leaders must consciously create a setting in which constructive criticism can flourish, where safety, support and trust are prioritised and negativity – at any level – can be called out.

How to foster healthy debate

It’s often those in SLTs that experience the greatest level of conflict, due in part to the high stakes involved in much of the decision-making at that level. However, this pressure is no excuse, and it’s imperative that clear guidelines are established and senior personnel, especially, lead by example.

Leadership teams should be taught conflict management skills, such as de-escalation techniques, how to mediate disputes, and how to redirect negative energy into constructive discussions, so they have the ability to stop destructive conflict before it takes hold.

Throughout the organisation, ground rules such as focusing on issues, not people, and using respectful language help to ensure debates stay professional and productive. Using structured techniques is another way to try and control the emotions involved. Formalised discussion methods such as devil’s advocate, where someone intentionally challenges an idea, or brainstorming sessions where the focus is on the quantity of ideas rather than quality, can feel like safer exchanges to participate in.

And feeling safe is key. Individuals need to feel heard and valued and be assured that their speaking up won’t have a negative impact or be used against them.

For too long, conflict has been viewed as a negative experience, to be feared and avoided at all costs. But, when approached with the right mindset, tools and environment, it’s not a threat; instead, leaders must recognise the opportunity to build a stronger team, boost performance and drive success.